i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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