It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
