My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
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