I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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