ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Randomize
