Swine flu. Run for my life!
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize