your thong is hanging out like whoa
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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