South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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