He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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