Rock
Scissors
Fuck
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
