she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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