I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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