At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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