Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
