ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
