have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
