did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize
