do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
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