There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
