You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
