Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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