I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize