i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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