That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
