Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize