I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
