i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
