Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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