she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
