After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
