Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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