Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
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