My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
