how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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