You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
