Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
