It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
