Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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