I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize