Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
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he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
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Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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