drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You need Xanax blowdarts
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
