she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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