Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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