I don't think brook has ever known best
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
