is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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