So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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