My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
