fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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