Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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