So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?