ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
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Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial