Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Randomize
